Disgusting straw pale malt liquor places sour yeast pungency above cloying corn-sugared malts and acrid maize-oiled sinew. Buttery dimethyl sulfide nastiness infects vegetal-smeared cat urine follow-up and cheap vodka reminder.

Muted sweet malt aroma, soft-bodied watery consistency, and corn sugar dalliance counter tamped down hop frolic to salted butter finish. Better than all urban-marketed malt liquors.

Brutal 8.5% alcohol-smitten lager better defined as rancid malt liquor with harsh astringency countering cloying corn sugar detriment. Stale dry finish and soapy maize aftertaste further disturb. Priced right for a cheap buzz.

Innovative brewer takes on uniquely challenging goal of making worthy malt liquor (sans customary nasty alcohol astringency) from gourmet milled corn. Encased in a paper bag, this massive plastic-capped 40-ounce bomber bottle contains well-balanced honeyed liquid securing sugar caned caramelized oat frontage. Secondary red cherry, bruised orange, and overripe grape concision backs thin barleywine illusion subtly embittered by floral hop spicing.

Tame sugar malt inertia and sweetened barley oats signify front end of mild ale. Delicate butterscotch-kissed finish retains functional creamy fizz.

Impressive 8.5-ounce malt liquor brewed with peat-smoked malts gains lingering creamy succulence as buttery Scotch whiskey richness and silky yeast smoothness inform mellow spiced-hop finish. Novices will find sweet barley flow appetizing while seasoned pros will enjoy finely detailed contour of this peaceful easy comforter.

From the makers of Old Style, one of Chicago’s best selling beers (advertised during White Sox and Cubs games). In 22-ounce bottle, this clear golden malt liquor suffers from flat palate, though bread-like yeast and creamy sweetness provide mellow flow. Crisper water boosts it above Bud and Coors.

Unsettling corn syrup mouthfeel and sour candy follow-up disdainfully unappetizing to ponderous flat finish. Lay off, homeboys.

Palest yellow pearl-headed crud with dried maize waft suffers from slick corn syrup flow, cloy malt stickiness, and dismal finish. Slim barley-wheat base, mild carbolic hops, and sour candy whim don’t suffice.

Canadian version of Carlsberg strong lager found on Montreal trip ’06. Cloy glutenous malting and phenol hop bittering slacken crisp water briskness. Rugged corn-starched resolve and musty grained finish decrease value further. Pungent alcohol aftertaste lacks fortitude.

Vital statistics: 8% alcohol in 32 ounce can for 99 cents. One-dimensional cloying corn malts and clinging Brussels lace never dissipate as musty barley-wheat rounds out dire diacetyl bottom. Compares favorably to France’s feeble Fritz Brau.

Listless lemon-dried pearl-headed clear-yellowed African brew retains soft-grained moderate strength and mildewed bitter resolve emulating German-styled lager, but weak-bodied nature and unassuming alcohol-saturated finish lessen its value.