Plain German-styled March-brewed moderate-bodied lager placates bland honey-roasted Vienna malting with recessive barley-toasted cocoa-buttered almond-pecan-chestnut sway. Rankled phenol-hopped vegetal stint submerges orange-oiled grape nut affinity to biscuit-y bottom. Some metallic debris encumbers backend of absolutely directionless mess. Better 2018 version brought sweet Vienna malt relief to brown apple-pear illusions and leafy hop-oiled foliage.
All posts by John Fortunato
LEFT HAND 400 POUND MONKEY INDIA PALE ALE
Brusque Old World English-styled IPA recommended to traditionalist British pub hounds who’ll take umbrage with negative designations. Expect tinny copper ale or musty Dortmunder likeness instead of more fashionable fruit-juiced pine-hopped bittering. Earthen fungi waft and black tea entry heighten weirdly vegetal broccoli rabe snippet, skunked herbal funk, and minor juniper astringency. Gnarly rye-hopped leaf-dried nut-smoked acridity relegates organic grain richness. Unlike American IPA’s, there’s no fruited sweetness countering rugged bitterness. Serve to savvy Brits and experimental pubcrawlers.
(NEUMARKTER) LAMMSBRAU PILSNER
Crisply appealing raw-grained straw-hazed light body. Carbolic lemon-limed Seltzer fizzing affects mild grassy-hopped herbal-spiced citric bittering. Subtle crystal malt creaminess contrasts scant wheat-husked barnyard-hay leathering to tidily astringent finish.
(NEUMARKTER) LAMMSBRAU DUNKEL
Easygoing organically barley-malted Bavarian dark lager retains soft-watered flow, dewy earthen funk, and banana-browned fruit-dried nature to timid caraway-seeded rye-breaded spine. Amiable fig-date-prune sedation, reticent chocolate-covered raisin paucity, and meager chocolate nibs influence find space between. Likable light-bodied German beer may not have enough stylistic honeyed wheat efficacy but milder tastes will be appreciative.
MOLSON BRADOR
For what it’s worth, one of the better mass-marketed malt liquor-like strong lagers of the ‘90s. Honeyed corn sugar buttering and chemical-like alcohol whir override overripe dry-hopped banana fruiting to frisky ginger-snapped finish. Creamy crystal malting nearly pushes this over the top.
MISSION SHIPWRECKED DOUBLE IPA
Bright floral-fruited alacrity lacquers creamy caramel malting contrasting resinous piney-hopped mildness of affable medium-bodied Imperial IPA. Clandestine 9% alcohol vigor stays beneath grapefruit-sugared apricot-cherry-tangerine tang and setback pineapple-mango glisten. Recessive almond, pecan, and hazelnut illusions backup well-rounded ensemble.
HARPOON UFO WHITE
Docile straw-hazed unfiltered witbier receives lively yellow-fruited entry above thin wheat wafer frailty. Prickly-hopped lemon-soured orange peel bittering upends dry coriander-spiced mandarin orange frivolity and zippy banana sweetness to unstable white-breaded floral wheat spine.
GOOSE ISLAND NIGHT STALKER IMPERIAL STOUT
Interestingly complex full-bodied ink black stout pleats deep-roasted espresso into oats-sugared chocolate-caked dried-fruiting and resin-hopped charcoal-smoked cedar stain. Mighty ethanol-like 11.7% alcohol fuming saturates vanilla-creamed chocolate-covered cherry sweetness, gooey anise upheaval, and recessive raisin-fig conflux. Muscat grape, molasses cookie, and black coffee illusions fill out dry backend of richly overpowering heavyweight.
GENESEE ICE
Nasty ice-brewed dreck offers cloy glutinous wheat slickness and stale sourdough breading to oily hop astringency. Clean water crisping makes up for cat urine waft, but this is some offensive stuff. A poor step up from Schaefer – the dumb beer to have when you’re having less than none.
FIRESTONE UNION JACK INDIA PALE ALE
Marvelously ‘aggressive’ golden-hazed IPA conceived as veritable spruce-tipped fruit punch alternative. Chewy vanilla-creamed caramel-crystal malting contrasts piney-hopped fruiting (and floral hibiscus-daisy-dandelion nuance). Moderate grapefruit peel bittering informs juicy orange tang, lusty maraschino cherry ascension, and tropical pineapple-mango-papaya-cantaloupe sweetness to cereal-grained cookie dough spine. Totally approachable for pale ale and strong lager aficionados.
FIRE ISLAND PUMPKIN BARREL ALE – 2010
Tinny metallic shard cuts too deep for pumpkin-spiced amber-hazed medium body. Muted pumpkin muffin illusion seeps into ginger-breaded nutmeg-cinnamon-cardamom seasoning, chai-spiced black tea bittering, and sharp alcohol whir. On second tasting, herbal gourd mustiness, earthen fungi acridity, and leafy hop bittering overload dank allspice-nutmeg spicing. Apple-seeded lemon-pitted black tea motif barely registers above iodine harshness.
ELLICOTTVILLE NUT BROWN
Passable English Brown Ale bottled for upper New York’s Ellicottville Brewery by Southern Tier. Hop-charred grain-toasted peanut-shelled cocoa bean salience above dry earthen astringency affects scant hazelnut-pecan-cashew influence, oaken vanilla acridity, and ashen chocolate malting to marble rye spine.