Pale ale, my butt! More like half-ass cotton candy-sweetened, sour yeast-embittered German wheat knockoff. To add insult, bittersweet lemony grapefruit summer ale likeness gets lost in fizzy carbolic dissention.
All posts by John Fortunato
SANTA FE OLD POJOAQUE PORTER
Waterlogged moderate-bodied porter conveys subdued roasted malt insistence to bolster soft-coated mocha creaminess. Pleasantly milder than most in its class.
SANTA FE NUT BROWN ALE
Sappy molasses sweetness embittered by salty dark-roasted phenol hop splotch as mocha-malted cola nut, Brazil nut, walnut and pecan illusions splurge. Avoidance of expected nuttiness at lackluster charred grain finish kills the mood. Go with Santa Fe’s similarly styled Penetentiary Porter instead.
SANTA FE CHICKEN KILLER BARLEYWINE ALE
New Mexico’s first microbrewery succeeds with creamy garnet-hued eggshell-headed 10% alcohol barleywine. Abrupt candi-sugared orange bruise, glazed banana sweetness and dark cherry tang absorb dewy caramel-butterscotch malts as receptive peppery floral-hopped bittering increases. Overripe peach-apricot-pear-grape-apple nuances find a spot in sun-drenched rum-soaked molasses midst. Resinous fig, date, prune sway falters.
(SAN MIGUEL) RED HORSE MALT LIQUOR
Cheap straw-hued 7% alcohol burn coarsens predictable corn-sugared cereal grain sweetness. Suggestive whiskey clip tingles fizzy hop zip to salty bottom. More like a stingy mule than the regal horse pictured on red-white label.
SAN MIGUEL PREMIUM LAGER
Squalid malt liquor mustiness informs crisp hop bitterness and burnt grain fullness before lemony freshness gets watered down (lowering the malt whiskey pungency by half). A lively lightweight champion in a pudgy brown bottle bettering most Asian competitors.
SAN MIGUEL DARK LAGER
Arguably the best bold lager on the market (if you could track it down). Succinct caramel maltose creaminess immediately buttressed by port overtones and chewy chocolate richness heartier palates will relish. Though mildly hopped and slightly oily, its rich mocha froth, sedate cedar char, and enduring burnt sugar finish heighten its robust overall intrigue.
SAN LUCAS PILSENER
Another perfunctory clear-bodied South of the Border pilsner. Grassy grain grid, scant hop fizz, and laconic lemony bitterness dampened by indistinguishable light-stricken dullness. Serve to Miller fans on a bad day.
(SAND CREEK) OSCAR’S CHOCOLATE OATMEAL STOUT
Precluding fine bittersweet black chocolate frontage and remedial toasted oats follow-up, this deep mahogany-bodied, dark tan-headed lactose stout gets oily by meandering mocha-soured burnt coffee finish, sabotaging underlying dry hop roast, tobacco leaf hint, charred wood singe and floundering orange driblet.
SANDPIPER EXTRA GOLD LAGER
Skunky odor gives way to flaccid sour malts and buttery yeast. Paltry hop continuance persists to uninvolved finish. Nothing special, but cheaply priced.
SAMUEL SMITH’S WINTER WELCOME ALE
Well calibrated, boldly boozy, full-bodied winter seasonal not dissimilar to complex pale ales, yet not as distinctively detailed as Samuel Smith’s Nut Brown or Oatmeal Stout. Sweet whiskey malts inform creamy vanilla-butterscotch frontage and cinnamon-nutmeg-spiced fruitiness contrasts slinky orange peel bittering. Sugar plum, stewed prune, and rum cake illusions relieve ancillary red cherry, pear, and marmalade snip to medicinal finish.
SAMUEL SMITH’S TADDY PORTER
Sam Smith’s been bangin’ out these bold burgundy-tinted dry bodies since 1758. Persistent black coffee bitterness juxtaposes creamy lactose-molasses sweetness, smoked oak-cedar wood tones, dried fruit flux, and dainty floral succulence for mud-honey thickness. Like fine brandy or ripe sherry, perfect after dinner. England’s most richly rewarding porter.